Archive - October, 2011

Halloween!

October 26, 2011 in Holidays with 0 Comments

If you ask me what my favorite time of the year is, I’ll quickly answer Fall.   I love the start of a new school year, the trees shedding their leaves that have turned beautiful shades of orange, brown, green and purple, and the weather that’s cold and crisp in the morning and just right in the evening.  The beginning of September just makes me wanna curl up on the couch after a long day and watch a good movie.  Now if you ask me what time of the year I dislike the most, I would also say Fall!!  That’s because when Fall arrives, that means Halloween is just around the corner and I seriously hate the 5 weeks leading up to Halloween!!  I hate the scary movies, commercials, Halloween City’s that pop up all over, the talk of scary stories, costumes, haunted houses etc, etc, etc.  I truly hate Halloween with a passion!  Not only because I am the biggest punk when it comes to stuff like that, I just don’t like the fact that the occult is celebrated at all!  As a believer I just don’t see the fun in watching Freddy Krueger taunt some poor little girl while trying to do away with her in her dreams.lol  But that’s just me!   Even when I was younger I couldn’t tolerate scary movies.  I once went to see the Blair Witch project (against my better judgment) and I slept with my mom for two nights after that!  LOL! Did I mention I was 19 years old!!

Now instead of shutting off my porch light and doing away with this days festivities, I do let my girls dress up in costumes that are not scary and I do openly welcome all the trick or treater’s and pass out (and eat) candy, but that’s only because I see Halloween night, the one night I hate most during the year, as a night where I can do some easy evangelism!  People are literally being delivered to my door so that I can share the gospel!  Every child and grownup that comes to my doorstep will leave with candy, a gospel tract and a “Jesus Loves U”!  Doing this is fun for our whole family and it’s my way of rebelling against this “holiday” that I hate so much!

Mourn With Those Who Mourn

October 21, 2011 in Suffering with 1 Comment

I was reading an article today on how to support a friend who is experiencing grief and it reminded me of how I grappled with this.  Earlier this year, my aunt lost her baby due to his umbilical cord being wrapped around his neck too tightly and cutting off his oxygen.  She was 39 weeks pregnant and in full anticipation of meeting her new baby boy.  As can be imagined, this was extremely traumatic for our entire family but especially for her, her husband and their other two children.  I’ll never forget the phone call I received from my mother-in-law the day it happened.  We all were outside playing and I came in to see that I had a couple missed calls from her.  I immediately called back because I figured she was probably trying to give us an update on my aunts delivery.  The three words she said still haunt me to this day…”the baby died”.  I just stood there in disbelief for a moment because I couldn’t really process what I had just heard.  I couldn’t believe this was happening to someone so close to me.  Our family immediately went to the hospital to be with my aunt.  I had feelings of grief, guilt and disbelief.  Guilt because I had just given birth six weeks earlier and I just didn’t want to go there with my baby when she had just lost hers.  I have never been good at dealing with grief.  I never know what to say, how to act, what to do or how to respond.

When we went to the hospital and I saw my aunt I couldn’t even imagine what she was going through.  I was floored at her strength as they prepared her to give birth.  No one can be prepared for losing a child after carrying them for 9 months and then having to give birth but in Lamentations 3:22-23, the prophet says that it is of the Lords mercies that we are not consumed because his compassions fail not.   They are new every morning, great is thy faithfulness.  It was extremely evident to see God’s faithfulness through her that day.  I didn’t sleep at all that night.  Most of the night was spent praying and just still in disbelief, as my own child lay sleeping on my chest.  A couple days later, they held a memorable for my little cousin at the hospital and again I was so apprehensive about going up to the hospital with my baby because I felt a sense of guilt.   I was a total emotional mess.  I couldn’t keep it together to save my life.  When they wheeled her out of the room, I couldn’t even look because I just didn’t want to see my little cousins lifeless body for fear I would just lose it and I knew we were supposed to be there to comfort my aunt and her family.  Again, her strength just amazed me and while everyone else was being the rock she needed, I was in a corner somewhere still trying to wrap my mind around why I was there in the first place.

After she got home, I wanted to run over there to see if she needed help with anything, or just to comfort her.  I wanted to send her a card or call her to see how she was doing…but I didn’t.  Even though I wanted to do all these things I didn’t.  I was always afraid I would say the wrong thing, or I would make her relive it all over again by talking about it.  I wasn’t quite sure what to do so I did nothing.  Believe me when I say that is the worst thing I could have done, and the worst thing anybody can do.  Due to my own selfishness worrying about what I would do, I neglected to see that she just needed support more than anything else.  Even if that meant I just went over there and looked stupid the entire time it was better than not showing up at all.  James 2:20 says faith without works is dead and all my intentions meant nothing because my fear paralyzed me from acting out on any of them.  God did not give me the spirit of fear so I should have recognized what I was feeling was not from Him.  My sister-in-law politely reminded of this some days later through a text telling me that anything is better than nothing.  Needless to say I felt horrible and realized I needed to get over myself and do what God called me to do in Romans 12:15 and 2 Corinthians 1:4 and mourn with those who mourn and comfort her in trouble with the comfort we ourselves have received from God.  I know from experience that just the presence and concern of others helps tremendously!  I experienced a traumatic even in 2007 and I experienced both sides of the spectrum that impacted me tremendously.    There were family and friends that were extremely comforting by being present, praying with me and for me, calling me and checking in on me and then there were some very close family members who to this day have never even acknowledged it happened.  And the latter kinda hurt me but I realize they were probably reacting the same way I reacted, not knowing what to say so not saying or doing anything at all.

The best thing we can do in a situation where someone is experiencing grief is to be there for them.  Mourn with those who mourn!  Whether it’s through a phone call, a card, your presence, a text, whatever…something is better than nothing!

Battlefield of the Mind

October 19, 2011 in Uncategorized with 0 Comments

Some years ago I read the book “Battlefield of the Mind” by Joyce Meyer.  The book talked about how our thinking shapes how we act and react to what goes on in our lives.  It also talks about how the enemy takes every opportunity to try and get us to focus on the wrong things thereby taking our focus off of God.  Many of us don’t realize there is a literal war going on inside of our minds.   The more the enemy can deceive us into thinking ungodly thoughts, the further we move away from God and the easier it is to tempt us to fall into sin.  James 1:14-15.

This book has had so much impact in my life because one of the biggest fights for me has been to keep my mind focused on God.    I have dealt with extremely low self-esteem, depression, anger, worry and fear all throughout my life.  So much that at certain times in my life these thoughts and feelings seemed to completely overwhelm me to the point where I could not even function properly.  Issues with work, school, family, and everything else often had my mind completely occupied where there wasn’t any room for the Word of God to fit.  It does not take much to get me completely thrown off track.   My mind searches for the worse possible scenario and dwells on it until my actions are lining up with the worst that could happen.   If I don’t guard my thoughts closely I spend so much time dwelling on what could go wrong, what went wrong or what is going to go wrong, that I have no time to stop and see what God’s Word says.  I have always been just enamored with those people who despite what happens to them they always have a sunny outlook and cheery disposition.  I often think…how do they do that!  I have always been the exact opposite.  Even when something wonderful happens I often think, what’s the catch, or for every good thing that happens to me, five bad things must happen.   I know this, I can totally relate to David when he says in Psalms 119:105 Thy word is a lamp unto my feet and a light unto my path.  God’s word has truly opened my eyes to how I was separating myself from God by how I was thinking (Psalm 66:18)

As believers we are to daily put on the full armor of God (His Word) so that we can stand against the devil and we are to be attentive to his words (Ephesians 6:11 and Proverbs 4:20).  In this way we can stop those negative thoughts before they get a stronghold in our minds.  The way we think is so so so important to how we deal with trials that come into our lives.  When negative thoughts come, we must first recognize they are not from God because He has not given us the spirit of fear but of power of love and of a sound mind!( 2 Timothy 1:7)  We belong to God so we must take captive every thought into the obedience of Christ because for as we think in our heart, so are we.(2 Corinthians 10:5 and Proverbs 23:7)

When I first gave my life to Christ I would work SO hard on trying to change myself and my behaviors.  I used to get so frustrated with myself and God because I would fail over and over again and find myself depressed, angry and victimized because I felt God could never use me.  What it took me a while to realize was that I had to focus on changing my thinking, not my behavior.  I wasn’t reading the bible daily and I wasn’t digesting God’s Word.  The only way we can change our thinking is to sanctify and cleanse our minds by the washing of water by the word and He will lead and correct us (Ephesians 5:26 and Isaiah 30:21)

To win the battle in your mind it is so important to immerse yourself in God’s Word daily.  It is the only way to defeat the enemy and increase your faith(Romans 10:17).  James 4:7 says…resist the devil and he will flee from you.  It almost sounds too easy but God is faithful.  Once I started exposing myself to the Word of God daily my thoughts drastically changed.  The way I react to situations is completely different because of the way I think.  It is still a daily battle and sometimes I fail because my flesh wants to let the negative thoughts take precedent but we must remember to bring into captivity every thought to the obedience of Christ.  His word never fails!